How to Greet to Connect

greetingWhy are greetings so bland these days? A young man was at the register of a retail store recently and the cashier asked how he was doing. The cashier’s body language did not reflect that he cared about the young mans answer however the young man’s answer did not spark a reason to be interested. Both parties may have passed up a great opportunity because of failure to show true interest in the interaction.

Most greetings are rhetorical questions that the person on the receiving-end answers as a means of being polite. “I’m fine”, “I’m OK”, or “I’m hanging in there” are such lame responses that an individual might have done better had they not responded at all. Those that ask questions such as “How are you today?” or “How are you doing?” offer a less interesting way of showing true concern about the well being of others.

For the person that would like to add a spark to their day and possibly improve the well being of others; he or she must think of a greeting as the first impression to someone else for that day. It is said that a person will only get one chance to make a first impression. If this is true, then it is critical that every first impression is made to count.

Instead of asking “How are you?” ask “What are you doing today that’s fun?” It is almost impossible to get a bland response to that question, and it forces the person to go beyond the collection of usual responses and find a response that allows him or her to actually begin a conversation. If being asked a question, instead of answering with the usual “I’m fine” and similar responses use exclamatory words such as “I’m Incredible” and follow up with an alternative greeting “So, what are you doing that’s fun today?” The above question and responses will be the foundation of an interesting conversation as well as a pick me up for everyone involved. When an interest is found in a conversation, notice the change in body language of the person that is being spoken to. Their facial expression opens up and a smile will takeover. People like to converse with people they like and nothing exudes familiarity like sincere interest and a bright smile.

So, the next time someone extends a greeting make sure the interaction amazes them. It might open a door to a new relationship that will advance a career or business goal. More importantly the greeting may have mistakenly or purposely helped someone feel better about themselves and their day.

How are you? Fine and You? Who Cares?

One most effective marketing tool that a person has is conversation. Conversation makes the world go around. Although we may Tweet, email, fax or text information to one another, nothing beats speaking to a live, breathing and emotional human being.


Why is it when the opportunity presents itself to speak to someone in person or over the phone we asks and respond in average cliché’s such as


How are you?

I’m fine and you?

I’m fine.


Or you may say good morning and the response is the same. However what are we actually saying?


People are so busy thinking about themselves that they forget that human interaction is the opportunity to advance to the next stage of the development needed to succeed. This is only completed by helping as many people get what they want. Have you notice when you greet someone that most people jut past right by each other in the midst of the greeting. Does “I’m fine” would brighten up your day or anyone elses day? Is “Good Morning” a question or a statement of how good your morning is or are you telling the other person to have a good morning?


Try this and watch the other person’s reaction:

  • When greeting someone or someone is greeting you do your best to stop and greet. If the person walks by you as people normally do when greeting then turn around until you are finished you’re greeting even if they keep walking by. Sometimes people can feel you looking at them or feel the passion in your response and turn around to reciprocate your effort.
  • When someone ask how you are doing say one the following (Incredible, I’m Amazed, Fantastic) and then tell the person why. If the person asking has taken the time to ask they may be looking for inspiration, so inspire.
  • If someone says “Good Morning”, then you say “Yes it is!” and then you tell them why it is.

You have to say the above with some passion and meaning. If you do not have anything to be excited about then you are nearly alive and not living, so find someone who is exciting and find out what they are doing.


Once you begin this practice when greeting you will find that people are excited to be around you and will be willing to help you reach your goals and “Give People a Reason to Talk about You“.